Philosophical tale about a girl

In one city N lived girl A. The girl grew, grew and grew. And she understood many things for herself. For example, when she did something good or bad, then fate rewarded or punished her for this good or bad. Rude – runny nose. I apologized – recovered. She helped and amused the people – she won a prize in the lottery. She grew up, but the signs remained. Once I wanted to stop eating and drinking, I lay down for three days, I got tired – and then I already knew in advance, but for three months I was ill with a painful illness. Endured. She tortured the snail in the hot sun, but then she nevertheless threw it into the pond to live. I knew what would happen. For a long time she was ill on the verge of life and death. Survived. Now the snails do not suffer. Well, there are many such moments … True, the girl perceived all this with love and admiration. Sometimes the girl realized that she had some properties and decided to go and meet psychics. I wanted to. And I started getting to know each other. From friends – acquaintances – people to find out where they are in order to communicate with them at a safe level. For example, she met one Teacher. He did not see her photograph, but when she was standing on the square at the agreed hour, he simply came up from behind and patted her on the shoulder. The girl was dumbfounded as it was he who figured her out. Another time she met a man who taught her to be resolute, not to get sick, relieved a headache with the touch of his hands … All these changes were noticed by her relatives and the girl was glad that they were happy for her. The girl decided that the main thing is to please loved ones with her successes, mood, and health. And if it is not noticed, then it is her personally. Therefore, in her soul, the girl allowed herself to cry, moan, burn in fire, split into parts, fly, dream … The girl noticed that if she experiences something for a certain period, then this increases her strength, luck, attracts a favorable turn affairs and regarded it as a kind of payment, only not in money, but in kind. Before important exams, she even, on the contrary, began to induce such states in herself in order to safely “suffer” – pay, and then go along the bright streak of life. Somehow the girl met another mysterious man. This man conjured and the girl had even less inner pain. But the girl was half-hearted: when I am not sick, my parents see it and rejoice. When I show positive, parents and others rejoice. And when my inner pain disappeared, then no one but me sees this and will not rejoice … So why did I do this if no one rejoices from this? If relatives are not happy, then it means that this should not have been done? And the girl felt sad … Then the girl thought that her soul must have hurt, and now she is free and can do some interesting work. Mom, look, I have a soul and she wants to be creative! – the girl said admiringly, but her mother was not in the mood and for some reason said: Yes, you don’t have any soul! But the girl had something … At first she felt sad … Then she laughed and felt sorry for her mother because she loved her mother very, very much, probably to the point of self-denial, but the same one really loved the girl very much, just not always able to correctly express their thoughts. And the girl in her thoughts hugged her mother and sent her the energy of love. And she felt good and comfortable. Because she’s so used to it. She felt needed and strong again. And she became afraid that if someone wants to save her from some kind of pain that is perceived only by a girl, but not by others, then she will feel sad again, sad, because this action will not be perceived by others joyfully … Sometimes it seemed to her that she, perhaps, could take upon herself the pain and torment, such as the crucifixion of Christ, for the salvation of the people, but she cannot afford such a luxury, because it will spill out into the outside, her loved ones will see her objective suffering such as illnesses and illnesses, etc. and they will suffer, and this is unacceptable. Sometimes, when the pain became almost unbearable, the girl, fearing for her health (an objective reflection of pain and the grief of loved ones), went to a psychologist, where she drew and sculpted from plasticine, gave away crafts and thereby got rid of a dangerous concentration that could harm her health. So the girl continued to live and feel a connection with something. She was very proud of this. In general, she felt completely happy. She just decided that for some abilities she pays some price and did not regret anything. When the girl was very hurt inside, she read books about thieves in law, agents of special services and security services, books from the School of Special Forces series, books on bioenergy. The girl had already become an adult woman, but she needed a girl to get joy … By allowing some actions, this woman pleased and cherished the little girl, who responded to her by the implementation of these actions, and this joy gave strength to this woman. Sometimes, as before, tears, fire and screams were torn, but since those around them did not see this, then … who cares?